Waiting for UPS

For as long as I can remember, I’ve looked fondly on the Hot Toys 1/6 scale collectible figures and fantasized about the day when I could finally afford a purchase so fine. 

When the time came recently when I could finally possibly afford to buy one or three of these figures, I encountered a new kind of dilemma: now that I could buy one, where do you possibly start in choosing your first? 

My first instinct was to simply buy my favorite characters.  To look at what was actually in stock and then just add  

But the secondary market of the line of Hot Toys figures is interesting, complex and ever changing, an almost living thing that ebbs and flows with the highs and lows of pop culture almost daily.  While I was in no way ever going to be an eBay flipper, I also couldn’t help but notice that some of these figures have doubled or tripled in price since selling out while others seemed to forever languish in the Last Chance! Free Shipping! discount bin at Sideshow.  And while I will never buy a Hot Toys product with the sole intention of making a profit, I also wouldn’t mind owning something that increases in value as time goes on. 

I just love Cap.  Full stop.

So while my first thought was to just buy the “Infinity War” Captain America and Thor and call it a day, I couldn’t drop the nagging feeling that maybe there was a chance to be a smarter, more informed consumer.  Since the Cap and Thor figures have been sitting around for a while, there was a good chance they’d still be around if I was lucky enough to be able to make a second purchase down the road.  Instead of just throwing my favorites into the cart, I looked at what had just released and took into account the views of the top YouTube critics. 

Months went by as I agonized over the choices I had to make.  Almost every day this summer, I’d get out of bed thinking that maybe today would be the day that I would finally click the BUY button.  I’d look at what I’d put in my cart the day before and new questions and ideas would come to me.  This Iron Man sure looks sweet but what other models are currently available?  I’d find a figure that I absolutely loved but because it didn’t come with an actor’s head sculpt, I’d move on.  I love the MCU and because the actors playing these supes are such a major part of that joy, buying a figure with a great likeness of a certain actor was almost mandatory. 

Can't say the drone didn't help me pull the trigger on this purchase

I’m sure I also don’t have to explain why a figure’s accessories influenced my decisions a great deal.  I disregarded figures who prices were a little too high and included accessories were a little too low. 

When I narrowed down the possibilities enough to focus on just a few items, I had to make the hard choice of perhaps putting off the purchase if a newer version of that figure had already been announced and was expected within the next... year or two??  Ugh, an expected release date of 2022??  My gosh, what kind of person pre-orders something that’s not expected for 20 months???  A smart, patient person, that’s who. But that's not exactly me.

In the end, I finally made an order.  And while my preparations leading up to this first purchase didn’t involve me making a spreadsheet to keep everything straight, maybe I should have.  I had lists of release dates included accessories and folders of pictures and made blog posts of possibilities to try and keep everything straight.  And so last weekend I finally clicked on PLACE YOUR ORDER.  And while I refreshed that UPS tracking site about one million times over the last week, I agonized over that, too. 

Why is it taking so long for Sideshow to get these things on the road? 

Why isn’t UPS moving faster? 

Why has there been no progress for three days? 

Despite my neurotic nature, I was good and only bothered Sideshow with two emails and they were great about answering me quickly and with accurate information.  They were on top of it and handling things. 

I’ve diverted this UPS package to an always-open Access Point a few blocks away so there’ll be no unlucky “I was in the bathroom for 5 minutes when they came” missed deliveries. 

And now today is the day I’m due to get this UPS delivery and I think it’s the closest I’ve come to the joyous feeling of anticipating Christmas morning that I haven’t felt since I stopped getting Kenner Star Wars figures in the early 80’s.  As an adult, I’ve bought new computers and tablets and beautiful widescreen monitors and I’ve been happy about every one of them.  But the excitement of getting something from Hot Toys is different.  It’s completely extravagant and can in no way be deemed anything even remotely necessary.  In the most simplistic of terms, it’s just a gift for myself. 

This purchase is just for me and not something that anyone in my real life will ever begin to understand (and so I won’t even try to explain it to them).  It’s taken many years but I’ve finally earned the ability to buy something from Sideshow and because of that, there will be no buyer’s remorse, no guilt and no fretting over other things I could have spent the money on.  Nope, this one’s just for me and I 100% deserve it for so far getting through a very uniquely crap year. 

Last February, I was at a low point.  And in two very long, drawn-out months, I made one of the biggest comebacks of all time.  Not only did I survive, I thrived.

So close and yet so far...

So, as I watch the clock and refresh that UPS tracking site again and again, I wait.  I’ve cleared off a shelf above the X-Wing ships and to the right of the Funko Marvel Pops.  I’ve read the incoming figures’ PDF instruction manuals and watched Terry’s posing videos.  I got “The Avengers” playing for about the eight hundredth time because my weakness and vice and fount of endless joy is the MCU. 

“Loaded on Delivery Vehicle.” 

“Out for Delivery.” 

Now that I’ve pulled the trigger and placed that first order, the only thing I’m afraid of is that ordering that next Hot Toys collectible will be that much easier.  And the same for the one after that.  And the one after that. 

But that’s next year’s problem.   

Now that I've made my first order, I'm already thinking about the next one and so here's what I'm thinking about for 2021: chubby Thor, battle damaged Thanos, smart Hulk and 2012 Cap.  Now that the "Endgame" figures are finally coming out, it's never been a better time to be a Marvel and Hot Toys fan.

Be safe, wear a mask and vote.  It's what Cap would do.

Thanks for reading,

Rich